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Mediation is not always easy – it can be challenging and uncomfortable. It is also common for parties to feel part way through the mediation that they are wasting their time, that the other side are not prepared to give anything at all and that they might as well leave. One important thing to keep in mind with collaborative divorce is that if the divorce cannot be settled through these meetings and one spouse seeks a court trial, then both lawyers must withdraw and the parties must seek new legal representation. This requirement provides additional incentive for each party to settle as opposed to hiring a new lawyer. Once the mediator has established some trust with a party and his or her solicitor, that party can talk in confidence to the mediator about what they hope to achieve. A dispute may appear to be about money, but it may be that there are underlying issues.
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There is also the result of alimony. During a divorce the court will take time to observe both parents and find an agreement in a child custody case. A successful collaboration will help the divorcing spouses move on with their lives, whether they have children together or not. Collaborative Divorce is separate and distinct from mediation and arbitration. Divorce laws also provide for the establishment of alimony, often depending on the length of the marriage and other factors. Spousal support is becoming less common, however, as more women are entering the workforce and earning their own income.